783.

Good evening folks.

I hope everyone is somewhere safe and healthy.

I'm happy to report that Baby Bliss and I have mended our fences and are once again living blissfully.

Hallelujah. 💕

As for the Hunk and I, we are currently enjoying a convivial visit at his home, in a location that shall forever remain undisclosed.

Stay tuned folks.

Good night everyone.

782.

Good evening folks.

It is with much regret that I inform you all that Baby Bliss and I are on the outs. I don't know what bug plopped in her soup but it must have been a big one.

She seemed to think that I should have cut short an important phone call to talk to her, which I have done in the past. But in recent months, I have decided that I will no longer do so because there have been too many times to count where my child has either ignored my call(s), cut our conversations short because of Friend A/B/C (or her boyfriend or his family or friends), or she ignores my texts until she sees fit to respond.

Cool.

I am her mother and I love her more than I have ever loved anyone else in my life. However if she makes it obvious that I am not a priority for her, then I will no longer go into panicked mama mode any time she decides she's gonna grace me with a few minutes of her time when I'm engaged in other pursuits.

She is an adult and free to live her life any way she chooses but she does not get to decree how I'll live my life. It certainly won't be lived as a member of her court. I am not her lady in waiting and won't be treated as such.

Love does not mean compliance.

🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸

As the world turned today, the Hunk and I shared a few more conversations and did a ton of texting. I'm hoping that even if our situation doesn't become a serious love connection, we can still be friends.

He's a smart man and it's rare that I meet someone who shares my interests as well as my intellect. I also think we can learn a lot from each other.

Que sera, sera...  💃

Time to snore folks!

Sweet dreams...

781.

Happy, happy Wednesday y'all!

I hope everyone is healthy and safe today.

My day began early. Very early.

My eyes opened around 6:30 a.m. 👀 I tried to return to sleep but it didn't happen.

Ahhh well... There were some urgent items on my to-do list so I began my day around 8.

By 9:30 I was ready to run errands. The weather was lovely (sunny, slightly breezy, barely warm) so I decided to walk.

When I arrived at the post office, the weather had begun to heat up and it was very warm inside the post office. Not stifling but I knew it would be if they didn't get the air cranked up soon.

Next I stopped at the local market for plantain chips. I left with the chips, kale, mac and cheese (already cooked), a sweet potato, Meyer lemons, 💕 sweet almond oil, arnica, and my favorite body oil (Vanilla Musk by Kuumba Made).

Definitely more than I intended to buy but I need to eat and drink today and tomorrow, my arnica stash needed replenishing, and the previous vial I'd bought of Vanilla Musk has gone missing.

The sweet almond oil was more of an impulse buy but it won't go to waste.

🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸

Mr. Skittish has called me twice today, the first time to check on me (he knows I broke up with the ex-paramour) and the second time to issue a directive about my upcoming visit with the Hunk.

He also told me I need to come visit him this summer so we can hang out and do fun things together. We haven't had a visit since our little New Year's party so probably.

Although he and I met on a dating site, he's become a loyal friend and more like a brother. He and I have discussed the fact that he's not really ready to date although he does want a companion. I guess I'm his stand-in when he gets to feeling too lonely.

I think most of us desire a romantic partner of some sort and I believe Mr. Skittish will be a devoted significant other to someone when he's ready, whenever that may be.

🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸

In other news, the Hunk and I texted and talked this morning as I ran my errands and returned home.

Nothing earth-shattering. Just every day stuff and more about planned activities for my visit.

Which reminds me that I need to create my packing list so I can begin gathering my clothes and other accoutrement.

But right now I feel a long nod coming around the bend.

Nap time.

Gotta turn off the pot on the stove first.

More later folks.

780.

p.s.

Tomorrow's date is cancelled.

With all of today's excitement, I didn't realize I hadn't heard from that guy today. But just as I closed my laptop to lay down, I got a text from him asking if I was still awake.

Dude...

Bad start to any type of relationship.

Or as my momma would say, "You done let somebody else beat your time."

As you were fella.

😝💤💤💤

779.

Good evening everyone.

I hope you've all enjoyed a pleasant and productive day.

It's been an interesting one chez Bliss. 😏

After my last post, I zonked out pretty quickly.

Well folks, I just happened to be rolling over an hour later when the screen on my phone lit up and the phone rang.

It was the Hunk, full of vim and vigor, excitedly rambling on about something he and I had discussed earlier in the evening.

My heart was racing as I listened, not sure if I was awake or dreaming.

As he paused for my response, I gathered my thoughts and told him how the phone had scared me and I needed to get up to find my lavender essential oil.

He apologized and said he called was because I'd told him I was a night owl, he was up and at 'em, and he thought I would be too.

He offered to let me return to my slumber but I declined and decided he needed to talk to me until I was able to wind down.

Which he happily agreed to do. 😐😀😶

After we'd talked for about an hour, he said it sounded like I was ready to nod. I was and after a few more minutes of conversation, we rang off.

I had hoped to sleep until 10 a.m. but I was awake before 8 a.m.  *sigh*

The Hunk called again right before noon, beginning a round of back-and-forth phone calls that ended when he called to say good night shortly after 9 p.m.

We talked for 30 or 45 minutes, ending with assurances that we'd talk tomorrow.

In between our first phone call and our last, we did a lot of texting.

We're both Gemini (which means any conversation we have involves four people) and our topics were all over the place.

In fact, while we were texting I was also e-mailing him from my phone (because he can't get images in his texts) so he was responding to texts and emails from me.

One of our conversations revolved around our plans for my visit. We established my arrival date and time as well as some of the things we'll do while I'm there, down to what we'll eat.

The planning itself is fun and it's nice that he seems to be as excited about it as I am.

We also discussed the protocol for my visit (dress code for lounging around the house, no sex, no tobacco, etc.) as well as the possible outcomes of my visit and what those possibilities could mean for us both.

Although we both know what we would like the outcome to be (because we've talked about it), I suggested we go into the visit with no expectations and no pressure so that we both feel as comfortable as possible during our time together.

I also mentioned that we could take any time necessary during my stay to talk about what ever we felt needed discussing. (Because at some point we will want to talk about what we're feeling and thinking. It's how Gemini processes life.)

The Hunk agreed with all.

In the many conversations we've had in the past week, we've touched on lots regarding dating and relationships (of course).

And although we do have common interests and similar life stories, as I've learned from living, it takes a whole lotta commitment to make a relationship work.

From what he's shared with me thus far, the Hunk seems willing to put in the work. Whether it's with me or someone else remains to be seen.

I don't say that because I doubt the attainability of our shared desire.

You all should know by now that I am the eternal optimist who believes in Love💕, Magick 💫, fairytales, rainbows🌈, Unicorns🦄🦄, heads-up pennies...

However I am also a practical realist who believes in hard work and perseverance. 💪🏾

If the Hunk and I can merge all those details into one big delicious lip-smacking five-star feast, we'll do just fine.

Here's to new beginnings.  🍧 🍯🍒

Good night y'all. 💤💤💤

778.

Happy Monday everyone!

I hope you all had a safe and stress-free weekend.

Now let's get right to it, shall we?

Tales from the dating world:

🌸 The ex-paramour and I are done. There was no card game and there won't be any for me (with him) in the future.

I've decided to let sleeping 🐕 🐕 🐕 🐕 lie with that situation.  😄😁😂

🌸 I have a date scheduled for Wednesday afternoon with a gentleman I met online yesterday. He's very tall, articulate, retired military, self-employed, interesting.

However, from our conversations, I don't think I'm really his type but I know he thinks I am. I'll meet him for a late lunch and perhaps he'll become a client, a friend, or a resource.

🌸 As for the guy I had the date with Saturday -- let's call him The Hunk -- we have plans to spend  the 4th of July holiday together. I'll head his way mid-morning on Friday, which gives me three days to vet him.

The invite is actually for a five-day/four-night stay at his home, up an additional night from the previous offer. I suspect it will turn into a six-day/five-night stay because Tuesday is the 4th and who heads home on a holiday?

I guess we can say he's invited me for a week-long stay. A bit much for a first visit, yes. But I'll be driving so I can leave any time I like.

There's more but I'm sleepy.

Bon noche folks!

777.

Miracle of miracles, I arrived on time and before my date arrived. What are the odds?  😂

The date went well. Dinner and a stroll at the mall. He offered several times to buy me things and like the well-bred lady I am, I declined.

He was very handsome, much better looking than his photo. Beautifully smooth chocolate skin, a gorgeous smile, friendly eyes, an open face.

He's exactly my height, muscular build, and yes, there is a second date planned.

I'm home and he's making the hour plus drive back to his home. It would have been nice to extend the date but a sista has other things to attend to.

The most recent ex-paramour and I have decided we can still socialize together so we're gonna go play cards with some friends.

Should be fun. I like playing cards.

Ciao for now folks!

776.

Happy Saturday folks!

I'm counting down to time to get ready for my 4 p.m. date. It's now 2 p.m. and time to get in gear so I'm not late, as is often the case.

From the discussions I've had with the date (several hours over the past 12 hours), I know he's always on time and usually early.

A little about him: retired from both military and federal government, divorced, no children, no pets, non-smoker, light drinker, home owner, northern transplant.

We seem to have many common interests, the most promising being our love of music and the way we handle our finances.

And yes, I did get my mani-pedi this morning.

The salon I visited first was booked so I went to the one Baby Bliss favors. They fit me in and the results are quite nice. But I did re-polish my fingernails when I got home because the color I picked in the salon wasn't quite sparkly enough when I got outside.

What is life without a little shimmer and shine? 😁 🌟 🌟 🌟 🎊 🎊 🎊 🎉 🎉 🎉

Nail polish, lipstick, a smidge of body glitter on the shoulders... It's all good.

Okay folks gotta run!

The date has to drive for over an hour; he just called to say he's on his way to get gas then heading to the restaurant.

Time to hit the shower.

More later... 😉

775.

And just like that  ✨ ✨ ✨ I have a dinner date scheduled for tomorrow, early evening.

If I get to bed early enough -- say midnight or 1 a.m. instead of 3 or 4 a.m. -- I can get up early and get a mani-pedi before my date.

This season's "it color" for nail polish is rose gold, a color I happen to be fond of. It's also a color I have in my shrinking stash.

Now that Baby Bliss is no longer my nail technician, I'll have to head out to the salon. There are two less than a mile from me and they both charge the same for what I want so it's a toss up.

The salon my daughter likes is closest but I've never used their services. They have a specific technique that makes the polish last longer and Baby Bliss likes that technique because she likes as much time as possible between visits.

I like as much time as possible between visits too, at least a year. That's usually my in-between time for nail salon visits, preferring to have my mani-pedis done at home by Baby Bliss. But since she's no longer available, off to the salon for me.

My last visit was a month or so ago. I'm going again tomorrow because it's difficult to remove the clear polish from my "French" pedicure which is my fault for adding several layers in the weeks after my visit.

My nails also need to be trimmed and my cuticles need help too.

If I didn't have a date I probably wouldn't bother but it's nice to be pampered sometimes and a date is a good excuse for it.

And now I have to go folks. Time for dinner or something similar. 🍉 🍖 🍤 🍱 🎂  I'm hungry.

Have a good one people!

774.

Happy Friday folks!

I come to you all with a clean slate, so to speak. It's a few days after my birthday and I am also once again newly single.

The paramour and I are done. Not by mutual agreement (he disagreed) but it had to be done.

At this stage of my life, I require a partner whose life is aligned with mine in Things of Importance.

Although the paramour and I had a really good time together, it was The Other Things that snuffed the candle.

One was his schedule. While he did make time for me, he was often busy with projects that left him unavailable to me in a way that made me uncomfortable.

On the flip side, the more time we spent together, the more I realized how our lives did not mesh well.

For example, I have no debt and don't wish to acquire any at this age. He has what I consider a lot of debt and it seemed to be no big deal to him.  👀

Another thing is that I keep any documentation that I feel I might need to produce for any government authority, for whatever reason I can think of, from now into the unforeseeable future.

I know it's not necessarily a good thing but it's what I do. He throws out almost everything, something that bothered me immensely.

I honestly have the first income tax filing I ever made. Which sounds like something a hoarder might do, yes. But everything is filed away somewhere so no documents are piled in stacks and lying about. And I am aware that I need to shred those relics of a past life. (As well as some other documents.)

Purging, tossing, and shredding are always on my to-do list and I'll get back to them some time next week.

Which brings me to the time factor.

The now ex-paramour and I live about an hour apart which equaled a whole lotta driving back and forth.

Once we got to the point of overnights, if we were spending a few days together at either residence, it was no big deal. But unless he was coming here from work (a 20-minute drive), it wasn't feasible to come for just one night. (He works every week day and sometimes Saturdays as well.)

While he is buying a home closer to his job (which is also an hour from his residence) and to me, factoring in everything else, that's no longer of any consequence.

Ahhh well... It was fun while it lasted.

Time to enjoy some downtime and then we'll see what's next.

🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸

In other news, Baby Bliss has been talking about taking another vacation. It has been a year since our last one.

I would love to visit one of the villages in Italy's Cinque Terre but it will likely cost more than I'm currently comfortable spending.

Last year's vacation took a chunk out of my discretionary-expenses account because I paid for us both. If Baby Bliss can come up with at least half of her half, it will make a huge difference.

Well folks, time to get back to my day. I've been up for several hours but haven't eaten yet. Not good.

Enjoy your weekend!

773.

Good afternoon everyone.

I hope each of you is doing well.

As for me, I'm still struggling with periodic episodes of overwhelming hormonal surges.

Earlier today in Target, it hit me that I'm about to celebrate another birthday without Mr. Bliss. I felt very sad and began to cry. Wouldn't you know it, I had no tissue in my purse. (Which further upset me because I try to remember to always have a packet of tissue in my purse. It's an awful feeling to need tissue and not have it when out in public and it's a feeling I do not like.)

I found a chair in the furniture section and sat. My next thought was to call one of my aunts. She was at grandma's yesterday and I thought she would be there today. She wasn't. After I talked to grandma (who I did not say anything to about my situation because she's been ill for a few days and I didn't want to add any stress to her life), I felt better.

A few minutes later, in the check-out line, I felt fine.

I've been okay since then but I believe there will be more to come because it's that time of the month and I have a busy weekend planned which can possibly add to emotional overload.

One of my sisters is coming to help kick off my celebration. I get her from the airport tomorrow morning. It's likely the paramour is going with me but not certain. He and I still need to discuss sleeping arrangements in case we decide he's staying at my place this weekend with my sister and I.

He and I can sleep in my room if my sister doesn't mind sleeping in my daughter's messy room. Otherwise we'll have to figure out something else.

My mom arrives on Monday to kick off part two. She and I, along with Baby Bliss, will picnic at my favorite park and hopefully get massages and facials. My mom is treating because this is a milestone birthday for me and she's excited.

Sadly, grandma won't be able to participate at all due to being ill. It saddens me a bit because I don't know that she'll be alive for my next birthday celebration.

Okay, so the tears are back. I'm feeling like I don't want to celebrate a milestone birthday without Mr. Bliss.

Not that I don't want to have a birthday. At this moment, I just don't feel like I want to celebrate it without my Beloved.  💔

772.

I know it's been a while.

Life has been busy.

My dad's failing health, the paramour, my "female" issues, Baby Bliss living her own life and intersecting it with mine when it suits her...

It's all a big mish-mash of Life.

I'm hanging in here as best I can but some days I am overwhelmed.

Monday was one of those days.

I was home most of the day, tired and re-thinking my life as I'm likely to do at such times.

I reached a lot of different conclusions but acted on nothing because I'm learning that acting out when in crisis mode is the absolute wrong thing to do.

So here I am, blogging at 2 a.m. when I am so so so tired...

I guess part of it is that I wanted to reach out to you all, my cyberfriends because I know that even if I can't see any of you or talk to any of you, you're all there for me in some way.

Send positive energy, write me a poem, send me a rainbow or a unicorn.

As always, thank you all in advance.

Love,

K.