817.

I'm making something for the wedding.

816.

Good evening and Happy Tuesday y'all.

After all the sad, shocking, and emotionally draining news that I've been bombarded with over the past several days, I have some good news to share: I'm planning a wedding.  💒

I won't say at this moment whose wedding it will be but some of you reading this may guess correctly. 😁

More later folks.

758.

There was no trip to the Big City yesterday. I decided to wait until Monday so that Baby Bliss, makeup artist extraordinaire, might accompany me.

I want to try new foundation for the party. Estée Lauder is what the daughter recommends and I've read great reviews about Fashion Fair. Dillard's has both so that's where we will go.

We'll probably have lunch while we're out.

And I might make a side trip to the mega beauty supply store, to buy more hair accessories.

I'm really excited about going home for the party. It's been a while since I've been to a party at my sister B's and she gives really good parties.

🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸 🌸

In other news of the day, Mr. Paramour and I had a date earlier.  😍

A lot of discussion about something we didn't quite agree on and other topics. 

What we did agree on, tentatively: the wedding will be in Vegas. 😉

Stay tuned folks.

755.

It was a dark and stormy night...

Just kidding folks.

Regarding my most recent date(s) with my Paramour: It was a warm and dreamy night. And a wild and wonderful day.

Lots of interesting conversation (more reveals), lots of laughter, talk of marriage (including what I'm calling an "invitation to a proposal"), food, lots of kisses, some snuggling...

Most interesting: the "invitation to a proposal".

During our meal, we talked about our lives and he mentioned how much we had in common including the number of times we've both been married.

I laughed and asked him if he truly wanted to get married again. He in turn asked me if I wanted to get married again. I said I wasn't sure.

His response (as he gazed longingly into my eyes across the table -- seriously), "Yes, I do want to get married again and I want to marry you."

(Well, okay...

Yes, I have had several husbands as well as a number of broken engagements and a number of proposals I've turned down. And perhaps one day some extraordinarily lucky man will once again call me his wife.  💕

Perhaps it will even be my current Paramour because I definitely dig this guy.)

My reply (rendered with lots of eyelash fluttering and an inviting smile: But (Paramour), you don't really know me.

Him: I like what I know so far and I'll get to know you as my wife.

Me: 😯 Baby... getting married means moving again. I hate moving.

Him: Baby all you need to do is pack. I'll make sure the moving gets done.

He said he wants us to spend more time together once he moves into his new house (now being built and scheduled for a mid-summer closing) and he doesn't believe in just living together so he's working on making me Mrs. Paramour but he'll let me decide when I'm ready and then I can propose to him.  😄

My thought: ideally when two people who are romantically involved decide to legally merge lives and commit before God and family, they are committing to doing what it takes to make the situation work well for both parties.

I know what I tell myself about the things I want to do and what I'm willing to do when I partner with the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.

The question I have to ask myself is am I serious or am I just telling myself these things to feel like I won't make any of the "mistakes" I made in my relationship with Mr. Bliss?

Which leads me to another question: do I really want to be in an exclusive relationship right now or do I want to continue to be free to date whomever I want whenever I want, believing that some future day will bring me the man I want to spend the rest of my life with?

All things I need to think about as the gentleman and I spend more time together.

My Paramour admits his role in the demise of his former marriages and what he learned from those relationships. I can only take his word for what he says unless he shows me otherwise, as he must do for me.

I'm not sure we can ever truly know every aspect of our partners' thoughts, dreams, past histories, etc. Perhaps we should not know some of those things.

Which, I admit, kind of freaks me out because I am still learning to release my controlling tendencies.

In my evolution, I'm still learning to embrace the concept of "now".

The goal is to know when that concept means throw all caution to the wind and just do it as opposed to when it means sit tight because, "now".

Get it?

No?

I'm not sure I do either.

I'm still working on it...

Whatever the outcome of this situation, I must remember to remain grateful for opportunities for self-introspection no matter the impetus.  🙏


p.s.  If this post sounds out of context in any way, it's because I'm tired and sleepy. In fact I'm finishing it up in my bed, where mounds of pillows lie awaiting my loving embrace.

Good night y'all.

Sweet dreams.

727.

Hello and Happy Sunday y'all!

I hope everyone is in good health and good spirits.

Looks like it's gonna be a lazy day chez Bliss.

It's a beautiful day and I'm so thankful.

The sun is shining, my windows are open, a cool breeze is fluttering my sheers, and I'm watching movies.

First up was one of my favorites, Dance with Me. Dancing, romance, laughter, love... My kind of show.

That Chayanne with his fine self... The first time I saw the movie, I wanted to learn Spanish and take the next flight to Cuba.

Luckily I already had my own hot Latin. 😉

I also watched Ray, a movie I've seen many times but it's another of my favorites. While the movie is highly entertaining, there are some truths that are undoubtedly altered or all together left out. This article at slate.com gives a clearer picture: It's a Shame About Ray.

Now I'm watching Woman Thou Art Loosed: On the Seventh Day. It's my first time seeing this one. Mega, mega, mega-watt star Pam Grier is in it. I love her. Every time I see her, I know she's my big sister from another life.

Maybe she seems so familiar because she looks just like a family of sisters I grew up with. They lived around the corner from my grandma. I was envious of them, not having any sisters myself.

There was the prospect of a date today but I wasn't feeling it and he asked for a rain check at the last minute.

No worries. The Universe always gives me what I need and today I need to be doing just what I'm doing.  👌

I'm also preparing Sunday Dinner.

Say what?!

Yes, that is correct. It's also funny. People who know me know why.

My beloved grandma once told me I'd never get a husband because I couldn't cook. Well she was woefully incorrect.

I've had several husbands and they all cooked. With the exception of one, they cooked right tasty vittles. 🍗🍞🍛🍤🍚

Lucky me.

As with most other things husbandly, Mr. Bliss was the best cook of the lot.

Baby Bliss and I dined out for many meals after my Beloved made his transition. Partly because I couldn't bear grocery shopping and partly because I didn't have much practice cooking.

Any way, that's all detailed in another post or two. Maybe three or four. No rehashing here.

Well folks, time to scoot.

A sista has to eat!  😄

322: matrimonial b*

hey y'all.

it's difficult to believe that next month, mr. bliss and i will be celebrating 5 years of marital b*. but i've known him so long, it feels like we'll be celebrating 20 years.

i wonder what we'll do for our anniversary? i'm not sure if we did anything other years. i can't recall off the top of my head...

ooops, wait...

to celebrate our first anniversary, we spent a wonderful weekend at this wonderful B & B, in the mountains of virginia. (i just visited their website and all i can say is "wow!" those folks have been busy! i see that they've opened a school. now i'm thinking about moving back up north, so my daughter can attend their school. they are really cool people. smart too.)

we've been trying to get to a well-known mountain city that's not too far but haven't yet. or maybe we'll drop baby bliss off at grandma's and have the place to ourselves for that weekend.

but with the price of gas, the word "recession" being flung around, and the upcoming plans for Other Stuff That Will Cost Money, staying home sounds like the best option.

- baby bliss has a birthday in a few months. every year her party is a big shindig. more so now that we've moved away from my hometown. i guess because it falls in with another big holiday and family comes to visit. so we combine the two events for a weekend of family, food, and fun.

-my birthday is the month after baby bliss's. and we're supposed to take a trip (maybe two) this summer.

- mr. bliss has a birthday soon after mine.

- the end of summer will be slow (but hot) and i probably won't want to do anything special but it would be nice if we could squeeze in a few days at the beach.

- my dutch sister is coming in september and i know she wants to see the town (again). also, she has invited us to visit her family in florida in december.

*sigh*

why was my momma telling the truth when she said money doesn't grow on trees?!

although it would be nice to see the mountains for a few days, thoughts of paying for a place to sleep and food to eat and gassssssssssssssssssssssssssss gives me the heebee jeebies.**

yeah, we'll celebrate 5 years of wedded b* right here at home.



** mr. bliss likes to say i'm cheap. i think of myself as thrifty. so we can have some $$ for our old age, ya know?

.

319: the "injured party".

hey y'all.

why is it that people assume that all women are the same?

specifically, that we will all react the same if we find out our husbands have strayed from the marital bed. (Women ponder why Spitzer's wife stood by)

every woman will not have the same feelings upon finding that the hubby got some nookie on the side. because all marriages are not built on the same foundations.

in other words, some women get married for things other than love and honor.

some tie the knot for cash incentives. these women are known as gold diggers.

some tie the knot to raise social standing. these women are referred to as social climbers.

some lesbians marry gay men because both need to get the family members off their backs. this is one version of a marriage of convenience.

some get hitched cuz they done got pregnant and think it's always best to marry the "baby daddy". later they divorce and are ever after known as so-and-so's "baby momma".

finally, yes, some do get married for love and honor. and yes, they might become the "injured party" if they ever learn they've been cheated on.

however, some women realize that "for better or for worse" could one day include a husband getting caught with his french bread in somebody else's jam pot.

but maybe some are mature enough to realize that monogamy is just one component of the marriage vows. and maybe they're mature enough to realize that although it might hurt now, one day it won't matter as much.

or not.

so maybe they pack their sh*t then hit the road or they end up sitting in county, for assault with a deadly weapon or attempted murder.

but i urge any woman who finds herself as the "injured party" to take a deep breath before picking up that ice pick or packing up the suitcases.

look deep within and ask yourself : do i really want to harm the man? do i really want to leave him?

then ask yourself what you'll be giving up if you do either one.

especially if you have young children.

if you think long and deeply and your answer is still fight or flight, and you decide on the fight option, then go for it. just make sure you've got a good attorney on speed dial, someone you trust to look after your children, and a whole lotta spare change.

cuz a good criminal lawyer ain't cheap and other people really don't want to raise your kids but it helps if they come with their own cash.

317: overheard at the home of bliss...

caught using his razor...


mr. bliss: honey. what's up?

me: nothing honey. why?

mr. bliss: using my razor, huh?

me (laughing): yeah. i guess i need to buy one for myself.

mr. bliss: uh huh.

me (still shaving): how long do they last any way?

mr. bliss: well they last a long time if your wife doesn't use them.

me: oh yeah? mine should last forever then cuz i ain't got no wife.

.