24: near-death experiences
originally posted Mon., Dec. 05, 2005; 3:45 a.m. EST
i've had several in my life and believe me when i say not one of them has been as painful as the 2-day migraine i had this weekend.
i had my first migraine several years after my daughter was born. we were at the circus. i didn't have a clue as to what was going on. we were watching the tigers when some genius thought it was a good idea to start the smoke machines. my mild headache got exponentially worse and a huge wave of nausea engulfed me. we barely made it to the bathroom in time.
i was so ill, we had to leave the circus and take a taxi home. i thought i was dying. i was in bed for several days, trying not to see or hear anything. (note that although i wasn't married to my current husband, we were dating and by this time, my daughter and i had been staying weekends at his house for a year or two.)
over the years, i've learned my migraines are directly related to what i eat, how often i eat it, and any stress that's lurking. i've always believed that junk food (pizza, fast food, candy, etc.) kills, but since it does so slowly, it's been a back-and-forth battle for me to abstain all the time.
so there are times when i indulge and there are times when i overindulge. at times it's only the dairy foods that bother me. particularly blue cheese dressing. but once my body has become overloaded with stuff, any processed food can tip me over into migraine-land.
i'm no dummy. i know it's the Universe's way of telling me i need to get back to where i was. but it's hard to stay on the straight and narrow when those around you toss temptation into your path at every other step.
i'm talking about my husband.
when my daughter and i lived alone it was a lot easier to eat for optimum health. once my husband and i got married and my daughter and i moved to his house, i began fighting a losing battle.
my husband and stepson will eat anything in the fridge that ain't moving. they couldn't care less about the difference between organic and conventional foods, like i do. to them it's all the same so they'd gobble up my stuff (organic) then graze on theirs.
i got so tired of them eating my food that i began buying the things they swore they didn't eat. and guess what?
eventually i began hiding my food but even milk made from rice needs to be refrigerated after it's opened.
then it got to the point where i stopped buying a lot of "my" food and just ate it when i went out. then i got used to not having it most of the time, which has led to now.
my most recent migraine was the most painful of all. i believe father-mother God gives us warnings of things to come. the warnings start almost imperceptibly: dropping a bowl of ice cream on the floor cuz i had no business eating it any way; burning the frozen pizza i put in the oven cuz for real, neither my daughter nor i should be eatin' it cuz we had one this week already; accidentally putting a frozen apple pie in the cabinet instead of the fridge and having it go bad cuz, well, it's mostly sugar any way.
so now i have a choice. toe the line or keep getting those funked up headaches. this one was really bad. i'm saying it again because it's true.
i thought i had a brain tumor.
and me, who does not like prescription or over-the-counter meds (unless they're herbal or homeopathic), went to the ER. i felt like if i died suddenly it should be in the hospital, not here with my daughter trying her best to make me feel better.
admittedly, by the time we got dressed and outta here (6:30 a.m.) my headache was subsiding. but even in its wane, it was still pretty bad. i was still sensitive to light and sound, and my body ached like i'd been battered with a mallet. and i was still thinking it could be some kind of tumor.
my husband was all for the doctor giving me a shot of anything that would lessen my pain and i was in enough pain that i couldn't imagine bringing it back home with me. so i let the nurse give me a shot of something called imitrex. i need to look that up cuz i coulda swore that was for diarrhea.
at least the doc was nice. they all were actually.
.
i've had several in my life and believe me when i say not one of them has been as painful as the 2-day migraine i had this weekend.
i had my first migraine several years after my daughter was born. we were at the circus. i didn't have a clue as to what was going on. we were watching the tigers when some genius thought it was a good idea to start the smoke machines. my mild headache got exponentially worse and a huge wave of nausea engulfed me. we barely made it to the bathroom in time.
i was so ill, we had to leave the circus and take a taxi home. i thought i was dying. i was in bed for several days, trying not to see or hear anything. (note that although i wasn't married to my current husband, we were dating and by this time, my daughter and i had been staying weekends at his house for a year or two.)
over the years, i've learned my migraines are directly related to what i eat, how often i eat it, and any stress that's lurking. i've always believed that junk food (pizza, fast food, candy, etc.) kills, but since it does so slowly, it's been a back-and-forth battle for me to abstain all the time.
so there are times when i indulge and there are times when i overindulge. at times it's only the dairy foods that bother me. particularly blue cheese dressing. but once my body has become overloaded with stuff, any processed food can tip me over into migraine-land.
i'm no dummy. i know it's the Universe's way of telling me i need to get back to where i was. but it's hard to stay on the straight and narrow when those around you toss temptation into your path at every other step.
i'm talking about my husband.
when my daughter and i lived alone it was a lot easier to eat for optimum health. once my husband and i got married and my daughter and i moved to his house, i began fighting a losing battle.
my husband and stepson will eat anything in the fridge that ain't moving. they couldn't care less about the difference between organic and conventional foods, like i do. to them it's all the same so they'd gobble up my stuff (organic) then graze on theirs.
i got so tired of them eating my food that i began buying the things they swore they didn't eat. and guess what?
eventually i began hiding my food but even milk made from rice needs to be refrigerated after it's opened.
then it got to the point where i stopped buying a lot of "my" food and just ate it when i went out. then i got used to not having it most of the time, which has led to now.
my most recent migraine was the most painful of all. i believe father-mother God gives us warnings of things to come. the warnings start almost imperceptibly: dropping a bowl of ice cream on the floor cuz i had no business eating it any way; burning the frozen pizza i put in the oven cuz for real, neither my daughter nor i should be eatin' it cuz we had one this week already; accidentally putting a frozen apple pie in the cabinet instead of the fridge and having it go bad cuz, well, it's mostly sugar any way.
so now i have a choice. toe the line or keep getting those funked up headaches. this one was really bad. i'm saying it again because it's true.
i thought i had a brain tumor.
and me, who does not like prescription or over-the-counter meds (unless they're herbal or homeopathic), went to the ER. i felt like if i died suddenly it should be in the hospital, not here with my daughter trying her best to make me feel better.
admittedly, by the time we got dressed and outta here (6:30 a.m.) my headache was subsiding. but even in its wane, it was still pretty bad. i was still sensitive to light and sound, and my body ached like i'd been battered with a mallet. and i was still thinking it could be some kind of tumor.
my husband was all for the doctor giving me a shot of anything that would lessen my pain and i was in enough pain that i couldn't imagine bringing it back home with me. so i let the nurse give me a shot of something called imitrex. i need to look that up cuz i coulda swore that was for diarrhea.
at least the doc was nice. they all were actually.
.
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