Sunday, July 5, 2015

547.2

Side note:

This is actually a continuation of post number 547, which threatened to get too long so I decided to break it up.

Maybe this should be 547.2 instead of 548...

Okay, I'm changing the title.

***


My last post ended on a bit of a low note.

Here's something a bit more upbeat: silly ole me has a crush.

For the most part, it feels weird in a good way.

He definitely knows I'm interested because of something I said and did. (Nothing negative and I hope he was able to intuit my intent.)

And honestly, while it would be cool to have his attention in a romantic way, I know that what I currently need is a friend. A real friend. A local friend.

Not speaking from conceit or self-centeredness, but with the nature of (many) men being what it is, I can find a man any day of the week who would want to be "romantically" involved with me.

But romance is not occupying much space in my brain right now.

Yes, I do have a few online dating profiles and I've been getting lots of e-mails from guys on the sites.     But God knows where my head is and the ones who have stuck are the guys interested in genuine friendships.

Maybe it helps that they all live out of town. One even lives in another country.

Our conversations (via e-mails, texting, and phone calls) range from discussing our daily lives to sharing our dreams and goals. We each share at our own comfort level.

With gratitude, I thank God for my love of meeting people. Everyone has a story to tell and I listen because I truly enjoy hearing people's histories. Even if half the stories aren't true, any tale told well enough will hold my attention.

Listening to and enjoying people's stories is my way of connecting to other people, to the world, to myself, to God.

The similarities in our lives, the differences... It's all good and it all fascinates me.

It's what facilitates friendships and opens doors to good relationships of all kinds.

Friendship transcends romance, but (thankfully) doesn't preclude it. So if anyone of my friendships naturally evolved into something more, it wouldn't surprise me.

But I'm not one for long-distance relationships. Which leads back to my crush...

I know the reasons why I'm crushing on him, which I won't reveal here. Nor will I say too much about him because he's a man in a public position and I would never shine a spotlight on him without his express permission.

What I will say is that he's kind, he's compassionate, he's handsome, he's intelligent, he's diligent, he's heroic.

I imagine him to be a good parent, chivalrous, harmonious, level-headed... Much more but I'm falling asleep.  LOL

He lives somewhere near and I come into contact with him periodically because of his job. As much as I can imagine he and I sharing delicious meals on hot summer nights while engaging in exquisitely engrossing verbal exchanges punctuated with lots of laughter, after our conversation the other day, he won't hear from me unless it's business-related or I'm responding to him reaching out to me.

Until one of those scenarios comes to pass, we shall remain as we are and he shall always have my best wishes.

As well as a tiny piece of my heart.

Amen.



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