Sunday, November 9, 2014

539.


Reminders brought to the forefront in the past several days:

- Maturity is... subjective. As is humor.

- False familiarity can never be a substitute for the real thing.

- Finding a suitable long-term companion can be comparable to finding a good contractor for a property re-model.

***

Mr. Bliss was a one-of-a-kind guy. I understand that it's not possible to duplicate the relationship we had. Nor do I want to. I am no longer the person I was in that relationship.

For all the differences Mr. Bliss and I had, we meshed very well. Except when we didn't. But we managed to work things out because as corny as it sounds, our connection was magical.

I'm not sure if the magic gave us the power to make it work or if we created the power to work it out because of the magic.

Before Mr. Bliss, I dated a lot. Some guys got one date. Some got several. There were a few long-term relationships, a few engagements, and even a few marriages.

Of course each man had something about him that attracted me. Some had several traits I found endearing. A few had that somethin' somethin' that got me to the altar.

Mr. Bliss was the Total Package.

The Magic was evident from the moment we met.

Seriously.

I had been at work for about an hour. It was turning out to be a bad night and I'd decided to leave.  Heading to change back into my street clothes, I walked past Mr. Bliss. He called out to me. Before I turned to see his face, I was more than annoyed at the perceived delay. But I had a reputation for being the "nicest girl" in the place, so I stopped.

I turned to look at him and I was smitten.

His smile was beautiful, genuine, and open. He was also handsome. Nicely dressed too.

We had two casual dates soon after but he was kinda slow at making his intentions known and I began dating someone else. The next year that someone else and I got pregnant, married, and moved almost 3,000 miles away.

Two years later, I left that husband and moved back to my hometown with my daughter.

In a seemingly random event, almost three years to the day we'd first met, Mr. Bliss and I crossed paths at a mall. From there, we slowly began the pas de deux that would become our shared life.

Our relationship was multi-faceted in ways I'd never experienced. It was fun and exciting, challenging and frustrating, loving and nurturing.

God had sent me the man who would help me realize who I was born to be.

Looking back from today, I know that my life with him was an adventure, an eye-opening education.

Every minute we shared was worth everything we gave to make it what it was: an amazing life of love, in every way we could express it to each other.

With eternal gratitude, I wish my darling a peaceful rest, until we meet again and resume our story in whatever realm he now resides in.

***

In the mean time, life continues to move forward. Sometimes slowly.

I'm continuing to move with the flow.

Sometimes the flow moves me to make the acquaintance of a man who piques my interest(s), maybe plucks a heart string or two.

True to my nature, it might be for a few hours, a few days, a few months. It all depends.

In spite of all things feeling personal when it comes to romance, dating, and possible courtship, I daily remind myself not to take things personally.

We are all dealing with our own issues, what ever they are. The way we deal with people is generally a reflection of who we are, not who (we think) they are.

Mr. Bliss let me be who I was and I blossomed. I know that I, too, must be willing to give this allowance if I am to share an authentic life with He Who Waits to Meet Me.


What I affirm:

-  There exists a man somewhere in the world who loves enough to accept me as I am but will always encourage me to be my best. I love enough to do the same for him.

- He and I will love each other enough to work out the details because we both understand what it takes to sustain a love that makes our hearts sing.

- When our lives are ready, he and I shall meet in the field "beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right doing", and all will be well.

Amen.

.

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